It’s amazing that one can actually disconnect from oneself. This often results when the world in which we immerse ourselves, starts to define us uncontrollably. The people we meet, the places we go to, the conversations that we have. It is so important that we maintain perspective, always, of who we are relative to the environment we find ourselves in. That mundane activities, challenges and routines don’t start to infiltrate the essence of our being, changing the internal conversations with ourselves too. I’m not saying don’t change. I’m saying be selective about how the environment is molding you and your authenticity.
I sometimes experience this dilemma. There are a few tricks that I find useful, which I thought I would share with you.
- Use a mental/spiritual mirror
Just like a mirror reflects back your physical image, allowing you to alter your physical appearance, so a mental mirror allows one time. The time to see who you are, or who you may be becoming. To change what you don’t like and put things in perspective. Time, not only to look, but to see too. Spending too little time reflecting, results in vicious cycles – an “auto” mode of moving and doing. Unsatisfactory actions become unsatisfactory habits. These habits become part of one’s character, thereby changing the palette of who you are. Disconnecting…
- Balancing your passions
How much of your day, weeks, months do you spend doing what ignites your passions? A life without passion is a life of mere existence – a physiological process rather than spiritual or emotional one. Engaging with what you love is akin to lighting the fire and energies that make your world turn. It’s the same as changing the lens of the glasses that you view the world with, or recharging your batteries. Your world becomes different. Perspective sets in, changing the balance between the good and the bad in life, for the better. I am not saying forsake your job, financial security and sensibility for irresponsible living. I’m saying find the time, out of the routines to spark up your life with that which you love. The fortunate ones are also able to earn a living from it!
- Let your surrounding reflect you
This does not mean buy the most expensive house, apartment or office. It means buying roses for your room. Changing a few elements that make you feel “at home” and connected. The environment has an indelible impact on your state of mind. Surround yourself with books, have coffee at your favorite bistro once in a while, wear your favorite jewellery and feel that “this is me”.
- Disconnect and connect
This one may sound harsh, however can be done in a subtle and acceptable manner. Disconnect from the people, places, things that make you do and feel not “like me”. This may not be possible for example, if the person is your boss! I mean a spiritual disconnection, and distance. Preserve “self” instead of being the “effect” of another. Stay in control of situations. Be objective and honest. At the same time, connect with those that inspire and uplift you. Those that make you “re-see you” and those who have your genuine wellbeing at heart.
This is another tough one. Be honest about who you really are. Don’t try to do things to please others, because that is not the real you! It’s worth it in the long run. “Faking it” results in unhappiness that permeates your whole world. It results in searching and looking for things that may not be there rather than seeing the truth and life for what it really is.
In the end, it’s a journey! No quick fix, just patience. Give it a shot and let me know if you find “you”. Maybe you didn’t need to look at all.